confessions, clicking and changes

Well, last week I posted about needing to get my groove back on and nip my slacking off in the bud. Truth? I was all talk.

I mean, I knew what I needed to do - but my heart just wasn't quite in it yet. Maybe I was hoping that by posting about it, it would force me to follow what I was saying. But I just couldn't get my attitude to jive with my words.

At first.

Now, of course heading into a weekend (a long weekend at that - and one being spent at the lake, no less!) it's no surprise that I didn't want to roll up my sleeves and get down to the nitty-gritty right away. And I knew that no matter what my attitude was - good or bad - the weekend would pass like a normal weekend...with indulgences and broken rules.

And it did.

I take it as no coincidence, however, that over the past couple of weeks I have been getting many comments from people again. Not just complimenting me on how I look - but commenting on how impressed they are that I've been keeping the weight off for so long. Little did they know how much I was struggling and that the pounds were slowly creeping back on. I guess it wasn't enough to really be noticeable to anyone other than myself, but these comments kept playing in my mind. They were sort of like warning bells to me. A reminder that if I didn't start paying close attention to what I was doing, people weren't going to be able to say those things about me anymore.

But when the weekend was wrapping up, I was still having an inner struggle with wanting to change things during the week. Even stepping on the scale Tuesday morning - and seeing an ugly, ugly number - didn't make me snap out of it.

But thankfully something just seemed to click during the day on Tuesday. I was at work and I was having a conversation with a co-worker (who is on her own personal weight-loss battle...and rockin' it!) and something changed inside of me. I finally got my motivation back; my real desire to start making some changes.

So that's what the rest of this week was like for me - making those changes. I went 72 74 hours without Pepsi (I had to turn a deaf ear to the girls' requests for slurpees on a hot & sunny afternoon AND have water with my taco salad!), I participated in no evening snacking (even while having a friend over for a movie night), and no afternoon snacking. I had one teeny tiny dessert while at my Mom's place - a small piece of one of my very favorite chocolate-chip squares - and I felt very good about all of my decisions.

Unfortunately, exercising didn't happen at all this week. We got back from our weekend away on Monday, late afternoon, and I got right into unpacking and laundry - and spending the rest of the evening with the hubby before he would leave for the rest of the week again. Then I worked all day on Tuesday, and on Wednesday I put my back out...doing who-knows-what!? So that put me out of commission for the rest of the week (and still is...). It's really too bad since I would've had the opportunity to go for a run both last night AND this morning, since my girls were away at a sleep-over.

But I am planning on running sometime this weekend yet when Les gets home (provided my back improves by tomorrow). And next week my girls are going to VBS (Vacation Bible School) every morning, which means that 3 of those mornings, when I'm not at work, I'll be able to go running too! So I'm getting excited about getting back out there, hitting the pavement again.

With my attitude check, and my good choices this week, I came out with a loss of just shy of a pound (despite my 'time of the month'), weighing in at 144.2 pounds this morning. I was happy with that, since it was really a 3 pound loss from Tuesday...phew!!

My goal for this next week is to get back to within my 138-143 pound window.